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  • Writer's pictureCorbin Allardice

September 1, 1911

It’s fall.

Heavy droplets drip sad and terminal--it seems this rain will be eternal.*

That’s sentimental. There is no fall--for me. I don’t want it. There is heavy labor that I must do to protect, to strengthen my soul.

Heavy labor?** Pretty words. I’m doing nothing. Not heavy labor, not light labor. I am not rising to self-consciousness. My moments are lonely, and without sense. Nothing connects them and no purpose illuminates them. I don’t believe in my goal.*** But I want it, want to believe in it. May my moments be: work and prayer!

God, fate me to believe!

By Moyshe Varshe

Translated by Corbin Allardice

*- This couplet forms a rhyme in Yiddish, “terminal” is added here to reproduce that effect. “Shvere tropn kapn treyerik [troyerik, as said in Varshe’s Litvak pronunciation]--s’dukht, regn vet shoyn eybik.”

**- Here, Varshe uses the word melitse. For more on this, see note to “August 15, 1911.”

***- The words for purpose and goal are the same, tsil.

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